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In my newspaper today:

1. Fool Sports Day.
Outraged parents have been banned from watching their children at a school sports day in case paedophiles sneaked into the grounds.
Mum and Dads were ordered to stay away because organisers insisted they could not guarantee the children's safety. Mum Emma Collett, 33 said: "I'd have taken time off work to support my child. It would have meant a lot to me." Another mother said: "I was told we could not go because there were so many children taking part.
"They said they could not estimate how many parents were going to be there and were worried they could not stop someone who should'nt be there from getting in."
More than 270 seven and eight- year olds from 20 different schools took part in the long jump, hurdles, sprint, 400 metre, and relay races at Sandy Upper School in Biggleswade, Beds.
Organiser Paul Blunt defended the decision, saying: "If we let parents into the school, they would have been free to roam the grounds. An unsavoury character could have come in and we just can't put the children at risk like that.
"The ultimate fear is a child is hurt or abducted and we must take all measures possible to prevent that."
Nick Seaton, chairman of the Campaign for Real Education, said the ban was unreasonable. He added: "It's clearly a serious misjudgment. One of the great pleasures of sports day is that parents can watch their children.


Stephanie.

2. Jailbirds 'A Secret'

Jobsworth civil servants are refusing to name escaped jailbirds - in case it breaches their right to privacy. The barmy ruling was revealed when Ministry of Justice officials refused a request under the Freedom of Information Act to identify inmates who vanished from cushy Hollesley Bay open prison near Woodbridge, Suffolk.
Local MP John Gummer said: "It's crazy." But a Ministry of Justice spokesman said: "We are not at liberty to disclose personal information."


Stephanie.

Don't you think this is all getting a bit ridiculous? I know schools have to protect kids but what could an undesirable person do with so many other people around? Lets face it, kids do not get changed on the sports field like they did when I was young. They are at just as much risk from being watched when on the school yard at breaktime. I think it is sad that parents can no longer photograph their own kids school events (plays, pantomimes, sports day) but to stop them from even attending is one step too far in my opinion. Thank heavens I neither have nor want kids! This over-protective, over-populated society we live is spiralling well out of control and I can only see it getting worse!

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Mel

Searching for lost relatives? Win the Lottery!

Is it just this country? What next? 'We cannot tell you what the murderer is called or what they look like in case they sue us'.

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Mel

Searching for lost relatives? Win the Lottery!

3. Bunting 'Danger'

Bunting has been bannned from a summer carnival by council killjoys - because it may pull down lampposts. Officers fear the colourful flags put too much strain on metal street lights.
Jane Harding, 42, the organiser of the carnival, fumed: "It's ridiculous. We have tried to call the council to reason with them, but they made it clear they were the rules."
Ferndown Council in Dorset insisted the lampposts were not "strong enough to support additional attachments."


Stephanie.

Think all 3 of these reports beggers belief.


Stephanie.

Unbelievable!

Absolutely ridiculous.

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Gloria

I'd be dangerous with a brain.